Friday, November 11, 2016

Testosterone Cessation Update... So That's What The Cramps Were

Courtesy note that this one deals with menstruation, a little sex stuff, and other body stuff, some of which is graphic... ish. Near the end there is also diet talk.

Yesterday afternoon I was overcome by some pretty bad abdominal cramps.  I'd been trying to echinacea-and-menthol away a possible mild illness and assumed this was a part of that, but it was low on my body and suspiciously familiar.  OK, I was pretty confident it was uterine something, and I have witnesses as I announced it in the living room last night.

I woke up this morning and... yup, it's happened.  I don't know if it's an actual period or non-menstrual bleeding, but it's definitely not just iffy spotting this time.  So I get up and suddenly panic because although I've been taking my menstrual cup most places, I hadn't the day before and didn't know where it was.  I scrambled to find where it went and put it in the bathroom to wait for me, but I was a little hesitant to try putting it in so found my homemade washable pad that I made to fit in boxer briefs and went back to bed for a while.

So here's the issue... testosterone did some really annoying stuff downstairs that made it impossible for me to enjoy or do a lot of things I used to do without bleeding for other reasons.  I went from being basically entirely self-lubricating to being unable to take even fingers without pain and tearing.  So before testosterone I loved menstrual cups, I had no difficulty getting them in, but that was so long ago.  I wound up getting it in fairly easily this morning with some lube... a slight amount of pain (more like a pinch) and it didn't open up properly so I had to re-insert the damn thing like five times.  Since I wasn't sure if it had opened up right I did continue wearing my washable pad for backup; it's been four and a half hours so far and no issues.

Charted it on MyMonthlyCycles.com and other than the cramps and a little sharpness (I may need to round off the end of the cup more when I get home) everything seems fine.  I've been taking black cohosh and am looking for other stuff to deal with the cramps, as they're either slightly worse than they were pre-T or I haven't remembered them.

Some worries I have... I have heard from some post-hormonal trans men that they wound up having what seemed like months of bleeding early on.  So far none of the serious horror stories of post-hormone transition have happened to me (I'm still emotionally stable, my hot flashes were mild, etc.) so I'm crossing my fingers hoping beyond all probability that I'll wind up with a perfect, calendar-friendly cycle (I know this is a pipe dream as this never happened before).

So this continues to go smoothly.

Diet-wise, I'm doing OK at least temporarily.  I gained a lot of weight recently due to anxiety and apathy.  Since the election I'm somewhat preoccupied with eating foods that don't make me feel like hell, so I'm on a shaky paleo diet; my meals have been fairly compliant but snacks have been a problem.  But even with the awkward popcorn-and-cheese-goldfish thing I have going on I'm at least doing better enough to not experience most of my terrible symptoms.  I'm not going to bother weighing myself anymore (I only know I gained because I went to the doctor multiple times in the past months) and am going to focus on avoiding stuff I know gives me headaches, stomachaches, and night-gagging.

The election was the deciding factor in that because I really feel like I need whatever health I can scrounge together within myself in the coming years.  I'm also compiling a list of ideas and resources that will go on this blog when it's done, so if that's something you're into you can look forward to that.

Anyway, that's all for now.  Happy trails!