Saturday, June 21, 2014

Transgender Blog Challenge Day 1: The Word "Transgender"

I'm going to do the transgender challenge somebody posted about somewhere because... well, I need the blog inspiration, I don't need another reason.

Today's question is:
When did you realize the term transgender referred to you?

I started playing around with transgender identity when I was in mid high school, but I didn't really have a coherent understanding of what the word really meant.  At the time I mostly identified as a butch straight woman, but as I wasn't a lesbian and I didn't have very many friends I didn't really have any community direction on this.

Anyway, prior to that I had memories of having seen documentaries on trans men and trans boys and identifying very strongly with them but having no idea that it would ever really be accessible to me.  There was also the perception that trans men were significantly rarer than trans women which helped stifle that.

I do remember the exact moment I started identifying as transgender, though.  I'd locked myself out of my dorm room and was drawing self-portraits waiting for my roommate to get back, and I suddenly realized those self portraits just seemed wrong, and I started drawing facial hair on them and changing their body shapes.  And I remembered those documentaries and that history.  As soon as I got back in my dorm I took a pair of scissors and cut my hair and started navigating the community online.  And that was that.